Let’s Fix The Mindset

How many times have you heard that curls are messy? Or that they’re not professional? Or had someone ask you or someone else whether they’ve brushed their hair? 

For so many years there was this mindset that straight hair was the end goal. The epitome of beauty. How many movies have a character that is given a make over and the end result is her curly hair shown as frizz in the beginning and then transformed into sleek straight hair for the end reveal? How many women in films are shown as unhinged or angry and their hair is untamed but the women that have it all together; the power women of the movies always have straight hair? We watch celebrities change their hair for red carpet events, hiding their natural texture under sleek up-do’s. So then when it’s time for our own event, we think we should do the same. 

Is it any wonder that most of us grew up hating our curls? Trying anything to tame them. Using heat tools to smooth them out and make us fit in with what the media and the world tells us is beautiful. 

How you’ve came to embark on your own curly journey is different for everyone. Maybe you got fed up of constantly straightening, just to step outside and for all your hard work to be undone. Maybe you have a daughter with curly hair and you want to love your own so that you can teach her that there is nothing wrong with hers. Maybe you’re just ready to embrace what is naturally yours. However you got there is fine but the mindset needs to be right. 

You can try all the techniques. You can buy all the curly products known to man. You can learn about protein and moisture and make sure that you’re clarifying regularly and watching all the styling tutorials but until your mindset is right, you won’t love your curls. Instead all you will see are the “flaws” – The halo frizz. The wonky curl that wasn’t kind enough to hide underneath but instead is front and center & the stretched out curls.

No one else sees these perceived flaws. No one else is staring hard enough at your hair to see that halo frizz. No one else is checking that all your curls sit in a unformed manner. But you see them because you’re staring intently in the mirror. When the mindset shifts, so does you feelings about your hair. 

Curls are professional. Curls are beautiful. They’re not meant to be perfect. They’re meant to be wild and imperfect. Do you look at a wild flower garden and think they’re ugly because they’ve been left to their own devices and not all planted in neat little rows. No, you appreciate the beauty. The rawness. How they know exactly how to flourish with no help. 

Your curls are the same. They’ll always do what they want. You just need to provide them with the right conditions. A healthy scalp to grow from. Lots of water. Keeping them trimmed and loving them.

Once you fix the mindset, the rest all falls into place.